THREE CUTE GIRLS AND A BABY

THREE CUTE GIRLS AND A BABY
WHO'S THE BOSS?

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

SINGLE PARENT-HOUSEHOLD: A cautionary tale?



It has been said  over and over again whether from the media or from someone I know that there are major consequences when a child or children are raised by a single parent. I agree, but there are also good and bad consequences in every circumstances or situations.  What I don't agree on is the idea that gun violence is one of the by-product of being raised in a single parent-household. For example back in October during the second primary Presidential debate between President Obama and Governor Romney,  the question of gun violence and what should be done about it was raised by an audience member.  Romney answer was: ( and I am paraphrasing) parents need to talk to their children about getting married first before considering having children.  In other words he is insinuating that there is a direct correlation between gun violence and single parent-household. (Tracing the Link Between Single Moms and Gun Violence - TIME.com)    Needless to say being a single mother myself I was appalled.   Indeed, it's understandable that he would say that considering he has been married to the same woman for years and has five children with her. And considering what just happened in Newtown, Connecticut on Friday Dec 14 where twenty innocent children and six adults were killed by a young man (Tragedy In Connecticut: 20 Children, 6 Adults Killed At Elementary School) who was raised by a single mother, I can see how someone could make the connection that that played a role in this awful tragedy.  Having said that, I am a logical person, so I  get it! But it should also be considered that not every relationship or marriage that produce children ends happily ever after, for better or worse and in sickness and health.  Some relationships or marriages end because of irreconcilable differences or worse because of abuse. I feel instead of making uninformed assumptions about people's lives, we should have all the facts.   

The heart of the matter is, what no one could have foreseen or imagined including the mother who [the son] also shot in the head and lost her life was that her precious son was going to kill innocent children and others.  Despite the fact that the media is reporting  she [mother] was a gun enthusiast, and maybe should have seen the signs that her son mental state was deteriorating, nevertheless I believe other factors may have played a major role in what happened.  For example, the National Rifle Association Executive Vice President, Wayne LaPierre gave a news conference reported by Media Matters for America where he called "for armed police officers at all schools and blaming violent video games for mass shootings, rather than the ability of those shooters to obtain a firearm".  The NRA's Question-Free Press Conference And The Media's Responsibility. Naturally as a single mom who raised two teenage daughters on my own I am inclined to partially agree with him.  After all, if being raised by single parent was the reason  for such senseless violence then we would not have so many mass shootings this year alone connected to mental desease exasperated by violence portrayed in the movies, violent video games and children bullied in schools. Furthermore, it was reported the killer or killers( Wendy Fontaine: Why Mitt Can't Blame Us Single Parents for Gun ) in two of this year mass shootings were in fact raised by two-parents.    I say partially, because yes violent video games played a role and yes I personally believe we should have armed off duty police officers or security guards at schools guarding our children, but I also believe there are other aspects that  played a role in so many of those mass shootings.  One being the accessibility to getting a gun in this country.  In fact studies have shown that it's even more accessible to juveniles (Accessibility of Firearms and the Use of Firearms By or Against ).  



In my opinion, unless you live in a neighborhood where gun violence is rampant and it is an everyday occurrence there should be no reason for anyone (civilian) unless you are a police officer or a military professional to own a gun.